Monthly Archives: April 2017
By Andrea Freedman
It is amazing how just a few seemingly innocent words can change someone’s mood. I woke up today feeling great, looking forward to meeting my mom for lunch and a fun day out shopping. Little did I know, my good mood would not last for long.
As my mother is a regular customer of the restaurant we went to, a waiter whom she recognized happened to have the good luck of escorting us to our table. When she remarked to him that “This time I am here with my daughter,” he replied “I thought you were sisters.”
After we had been seated and I thought the waiter was out of earshot, I blurted out to my mom what an idiot I thought he was for saying that. She tried to defend him by saying that he had only meant it as a compliment to her. “That’s nice for you, but how I am supposed to feel?” I said, and then went on to call him a few not-so-nice names.
While I am flattered to be compared to my mother, I am 23 years younger than her so if people think we look like sisters, what does that say about me?
The truth is, throughout the past year there have been many times I have looked in the mirror and been horrified at what I saw so I was already feeling a bit sensitive. When the waiter implied that I appeared to be similar in age to my own mother, it didn’t help matters.
The gentleman did in fact hear what I was saying (as my mom tells me the other nearby patrons probably did as well) because he came over to try to confirm that he had in fact only intended what he said as a compliment to my mother.
I wouldn’t hear a word of it and went on to explain to him that sometimes, when you are trying to say something nice to one person, you can inadvertently make someone else feel bad. After he realized that trying to win me over was a lost cause, he slinked off and a different waiter appeared at our table a few moments later, which was obviously fine with me.
Later on I was able to look back at the incident and laugh (just a little bit). After all, I suppose it could have been worse, as my mom reminded me when she joked “Imagine how you would have felt if he thought I was your daughter!”
Luckily my mom saw the humor in the situation and hopefully she won’t be too embarrassed by my tirade to go back to the restaurant. I’m proud that I have a mother who takes such good care of herself and who is healthy, youthful and looks great and I hope she stays that way!
I feel a little bad that I was so harsh with the waiter, but I venture to say that he will think twice the next time he is about to tell a mother-daughter duo that they look like sisters or perhaps the next time he is about to say anything for that matter!♠
What do you think? Was I being too sensitive or unfair to the waiter or did I teach him a valuable lesson? How would you feel if you were in my place?
Copyright by Andrea Freedman 2017.